Updated: Apr 19
Learn to set boundaries. Make it known what people won’t and can’t do to you and stand firm on that.
I say this to say why do we compromise ourselves or our “boundaries” for the sake of others? If someone Is toxic to your life why keep them around? if certain places make you uncomfortable why keep going? If the food isn’t good for the soul, why keep eating it? I had gone through a point in my life where I was doing things to make others happy or convincing myself it was what I wanted until
I realized I was lost in wanting what others wanted for me instead of what I wanted for myself.
I realized I wasn’t taking my thoughts, my feelings and my life in consideration. I was totally being selfless. I had been on this journey of just saying yes to everything, and When telling a person No, people would often call me selfish....But how?
How can one be selfish when choosing what makes them happy?
I learned whether you say yes or no it will release emotions from the person receiving it. Not everyone will like your No, or even understand it. You may lose friends,family members and people in general connected to you, due to simply saying No. people also aren’t going to always be happy for your Yes. Some will despise your yes.
BUT LISTEN, you can’t make everyone happy and that’s okay, but not making yourself happy that’s a problem.
Have you ever told someone no and then they make you feel bad for saying simply No, so you quickly change your answer to yes... yep been there to. You have to get to a mindset if it’s not positive or helping you grow Let it or them go.Change your mindset about the power in which you have. And learn it’s okay to just say “No.” People will only push you as far as you let them. My mom use to always tell me as a young girl “ you can’t let people treat you any kind of way” And I use to get so angry, because I knew what she wanted me to do; she wanted me to stand up for myself and speak my mind. But I cared so much about other’s feelings and thoughts, that I felt My feelings didn’t matter. Sounds crazy right?! Ironically i actually speak my mind much more now than before, because I’m well aware of my worth and the importance of my “No.” But trust me when I say, it took me a while to get here and girl I’m still growing. I literally had to get to a point in which I wanted to break free from the thoughts of others. But first I had to Learn to value myself with grace and change my mindset. Learning to value yourself is knowing who you are and being confident in it. Gracing yourself is a state of mind.
Speak victoriously about yourself. Be pleasing to yourself and God. When we speak victoriously, we honor What God says about us in his word. Learn to speak positive, and think positive. Love and learn to grace yourself in pure elegance and love. Never allow anyone to dim your light Or anyone to influence your decisions in life. God gives us the power to make and do the right things in life. Know that when we are made right in God we begin to talk and think right of ourselves and for ourselves. So accept who you are in God and know as long as your pleasing God and yourself that’s all that matters. God created you to be a you and it’s okay to say no to others and yes to yourself over and over again.